One way to do so is to talk to yourself using your name and the word “you,” as if you were advising someone else, a technique called “distant self-talk.” Research shows that it’s much easier for us to advise other people on their problems than it is to advise ourselves, a phenomenon called “Solomon’s paradox.” (The Bible’s King Solomon was famously adept at doling out sound advice to others, but floundered when it came to exercising good judgment in his own life.)
Many people wonder how they can control their chatter. Talking to yourself can be helpful-if you do it the right way.
If you can master the art of introspection without the chatter, you can get your internal conversations back on track. We worry, ruminate, and catastrophize rather than think clearly in ways that allow us to solve problems, innovate, and create. Rather than make people feel better, introspection often leads them to experience something else-chatter.Ĭhatter is the cycle of negative thoughts and feelings that turn our capacity for introspection into a vulnerability rather than a strength. But more often than not, people’s attempts to use this tool backfires. In fact, some scientists think it is one of the defining evolutionary advances that distinguishes human beings from other species. Introspection-the ability to observe one’s own mental processes-is a valuable tool for reflection and decision-making. Listen to our “Book Bite” summary on the app 1.
His research on controlling the conscious mind has been featured in the New York Times, The New Yorker, the New England Journal of Medicine, and Science.īelow, Ethan shares 5 key insights from his new book, Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It (available now on Amazon).
is a Professor of Psychology and Management at the University of Michigan, where he directs the Emotion & Self Control Laboratory.
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